TRUCK...........

we got the rest of our paper work together last night. today i have to go get copies of a couple of things, but we'll go after bill gets off work this afternoon and pick up my truck. i'm excited!

I'm torn about billy. I just can't figure out what it is I feel. I'm supposed to "love " him, but i don't think I do. How can I go thru life living with a man I'm not in love with? It's a financial thing that keeps me hanging on. I just don't know what to do. being on SSDisability - getting a real job is out of the question, so I'm just flat stuck.............unless I get a job under the table, so to speak. I have business cards, but no one is biting. I do tractor work, have a place to board horses, and I train young horses. I just don't know what the good Lord wwants of me. I don't know where my life is supposed to go. I feel lost this morning.